How to Handle Backstabbers

It's a sad fact of life, but at some point you are probably going to come across a backstabber: Someone who pretends to be your friend, but is really talking about you and making maneuvers behind your back to sabotage you. They come in all shape and sizes, and backstabbing can come in many forms, from playground disloyalty among kids to the corporate level where someone plots to take your job. How you handle them can mean the difference between turning into a backstabber yourself or an image of strength and dignity.

1. Step 1

   Keep your composure. Don't go into a screaming fit. Raving will only make the backstabber and his co-conspirators feel justified that they were right.

2. Step 2

   Walk away from the situation. Give yourself a few moments, maybe even days, to mull over the betrayal.

3. Step 3

   Communicate with your backstabbing friend once you feel like you can talk without screaming. Don't talk with others about the person and how he made you feel. Talking behind his back makes you no different, so go directly to him.

4. Step 4

   Be honest. Don't tiptoe around the subject. At the same time think communication, not confrontation. With the right communication you just might be able to heal the friendship because sometimes the perceived back stabbing is nothing more than a misunderstanding.

5. Step 5

   If it was really a misunderstanding make a pact to communicate more and allow your friend to redeem herself.

6. Step 6

   Walk away if your friend continues to betray you. There are times you just have to move on.